2023: My Year of Rest
This year, I made it my intention to rest more. Goodness gracious. This is a tough one for me. Most of us probably struggle with this concept because we have been raised in a grind culture. After all of my many diagnoses, I am deciding I must do something different because the way I’ve been living my life just isn’t working. It’s so sad to me the way most of us approach rest; it can really feel like we are being unproductive when we decide to take a nap. It has finally hit me that I must resist this idea because it just doesn’t make any sense.
This past weekend, I took really good care of myself. I kept coming back to this thought that I was going to act as if I was caring for my very best friend this weekend. I decided that I was going to care for my body with the most love and tenderness. I’m a beginner at this thing. So on Saturday, I decided I could take a nap. It was glorious.
We are conditioned to function in a capitalist culture where the norm is to burn ourselves out. This way of being is often rewarded as a sign of strength, competence and perseverance. I’m tired of this way of being. It’s no wonder mental health challenges are on the rise, people have so many physical ailments and are just generally not okay. We have forgotten how to care for our basic needs in a lot of ways.
I’ve had to retrain my brain over the last couple of months to understand that rest is PRODUCTIVE. Taking care of my body is producing something - it is producing a happier, healthier, calmer me. That is a gift to the world, people. Laying down for an hour is in fact doing something useful. It’s not laziness, it’s not weak, it’s actually the opposite of that. It is a sign of strength to know your limits and honor them. I’m learning to reframe the way we have been conditioned and flip the script on what productivity means. I’m no good to anyone when I am burned out, exhausted and at the end of my patience.
Since I very much am at the beginning of this learning about rest, I have come to understand that I am not very good at napping. I can sleep like a little baby at night, but putting myself in bed in the middle of the day is a struggle. I’m going to keep working on it. Regardless of the type of rest it is, getting rest is critical for our surviving and thriving. I feel like a new woman after a good nap.
I’ve worked on some practices to make napping a little easier: putting the phone down ahead of time, getting into the comfiest sweats, drinking a cup of tea or water, playing some soft music or a guided meditation, etc. I have to set the space to allow my body to slow down and slip into a state of rest. I can’t just expect to stop everything I’m doing and take a nap. It needs to be intentional and set up in a way for me to succeed.
My life has improved dramatically by practicing rest. I’m just beginning and I’m looking forward to getting better at it. Let’s work on taking better care of ourselves - like we would our very best friend. We deserve that kind of love and self-compassion.
